To Make or Not to Make

My work has finally done something cool, and it's causing me a dilemma.

We merged with another company late last year (which unfortunately eliminated the usual open-bar Christmas party, but I'm not bitter. Wait, I'm totally bitter. Never mind). But as it turns out, the new partner we acquired in the merge really likes Halloween. It's one of his favorite holidays. So this year, for the first time, we're having a Halloween party. Which would be cool, except that it's during lunch and it's a potluck. (It's still somewhat nice, because I'm sure we'll all take a really long lunch without being docked for it, but this company tends to pay for lunch at the drop of a hat. Why not for this? And, of course, there won't be alcohol. Oops... still bitter.)

And, as it's Halloween, we're supposed to wear costumes. Now, my company isn't cruel, so costumes aren't mandatory. Some people just don't enjoy dressing up, and that's fine. Others will probably dress up in things that will make everyone else wish they hadn't, but that's a whole different blog. In fact, I think I've done it already. They announced the party via email a couple of weeks ago, and I was mildly pleased. It's an excuse to dress up, obviously. But then in today's meeting, things really got interesting.

It turns out that the party will feature a costume contest, and the top prize is $200. Two hundred dollars! For something that I love doing anyway. I mean, who else at my company spends their weekends sketching and sewing costumes? (It's possible there are others, but I've pretty much scoped out everybody for geek potential, and I haven't found much.) So, needless to say, I want to win that contest. I want to annihilate them. Plus, my birthday is three days after Halloween, so winning would be an early birthday present for me.

Therein lies the dilemma. Or, actually, dilemmas. First of all, three-quarters of my costumes are simply not work-appropriate. I'm sure that normal standards of dress don't exactly apply to Halloween costumes, but there are still limits. Costumes for which I wear boots but no pants, for example. Also, costumes held on by two straps and four safety pins. Next - the titular dilemma. (And no, that's not what it sounds like - I've already covered that one. Read the title of the post, gutter-brain.) I was really looking forward to wearing something I had made with my own two hands. But I'm still a beginner, and my most impressive costumes were made either professionally or by other people. And then, the last dilemma - obscurity. Lots of my best costumes, including the one that won the prize at my friend's party last year, are from less-than-mainstream sci-fi/fantasy/comic references, and no one at my work will know who I am. I'm pretty sure, for instance, that no one will recognize Buffy the vampire slayer unless I bring my three-foot replica Slayer scythe, and I'm also pretty sure that bringing realistic-looking weapons (even unsharpened weapons) to work is not a good idea.

I've also got a sneaking suspicion that with the contest being judged by the four male partners (two of whom have gorgeous, twenty-years-younger trophy wives), showing just the right amount of skin and/or cleavage could get me the win. But that's... well, cheating, demeaning to women, and worst of all, fiendishly difficult. What is exactly the right amount? And you have to err on the side of caution, lest everyone think you're dressed as a hooker, or, worse yet, figure out that you're trying to cheat.

I haven't come to any conclusions yet, but I'll report them as soon as I do. It's a fun problem to have, anyway, and vastly more interesting than my actual work.

Coming soon - more costume pics, possibly with people in them!